Thursday, September 3, 2009

Excerpt for "UNIVERSAL FILIPINO" - Crack in the 80's

(Music Plays in Black out. Everlasting Bass by Rodney O and Joe Cooley.  Image of SFC on video screen. Lights slowly fade up on Jeremy freestyle dancing.  He ends on the ground.  Spotlight.  He begins monolog by smoking a glass pipe. CRACK!)



Crack cocaine came infecting those who shared your same last name

Brothers and fathers, even mother’s and daughters

All faltered on the destructive path in the fast lane

Immediate gratification causing pain


Life was slow

So free basing sent the soul into an artificial paradise

Laced with a government spice


“If you live in despair

and poverty stares at your face

sometimes a $20 taste

can help one escape

morality then becomes baked with disillusionment

the consequences can be permanent

as a result of mass unemployment”


(Kilusan1898 walks behind a pole)


My father was laid off from a good job

And for the next 10 years

He seemed always pissed off,

Coughing up blood,

Passing out on the living room rug

Coming home with a mug

Because no one would hire him


The light of hope turned dim

And my family was introduced to crack cocaine

It drained protest hot communities

It stole from families,

Many violent night tragedies still explode into memory

Pond shop jeopardy:  TV’s, VCR’s and jewelry

Even children Nintendo birthday presents


Father’s became thieves

Mother’s were led to believe

That free basing and tasting this drug

Would provide them love that hugged away all problems


Crack house basement asylums

Within close circumference to children who played in the streets

Wolves thriving off sheep

No sleep as a government whispered, “Escaped, Escape….

Escape from the hate….

Escape from the internalized rape….



It was their fear and hate

that brought us to this desperate point of self-destruction


(He ends monolog by smoking the glass pipe once more).



If I could go back in time I would first hug my father and whisper in his heart that his whole family loves him.  Then I would take that glass pipe out of his hand and throw it at the White House.


But we’re not living in some kind of Marvel comic fantasy.  So let me just tell it like it is, I was the son who just listened to my father while he was drugged out of his mind.  I guess all he wanted was someone to listen to his darkest fears without judgement.  He would call me late at night.



Jing! Come over here and bring me a glass of water with ice in it. Come here now.



I would walk real slow.  I was just a kid, afraid of being beaten by pops.  His smell of smoke, alcohol and the red in his eyes made him look demonic.  But still I went because I had no choice



What are you scared to spend time with your dad?  Who do you think you are?  You don’t know how lucky you are to grow up in America.  We didn’t have nothing in the Philippines.  You, your brothers and your mom hate me.  And for what, because I don’t have a job.  You all didn’t say shit when I was buying everything for this family.  Don’t worry, you better thank me because I’m teaching you how you don’t want to end up.  You hear me.  Don’t you ever be like me.



Then he would start talking in Tagalog.  I couldn’t understand Tagalog but I knew he was hurting because water would swell up in his eyes.  And just like that he would pass out.    The TV eventually turned to static.  I would get up. Cover my father with a blanket.  Empty out all the cobra 4 ounce bottles. Throw away all the cigarette butt’s.  And say a prayer for my father.  My grandmother told me to always pray for my parents no matter what.  And that’s what I did.


You know, in elementary school, when my friends were experimenting with weed and getting drunk, all I could do was watch.  My father’s example traumatized me and I didn’t have the curiosity to try it myself.  I didn’t want to get like my father when he was on drugs.


I love you dad.

(lights fade out)

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